f is for flu

At the rate we are going, I supposed it will take at least a week or two for everyone to be freed from the flu bug. Hmm, I pity the kids, such a horrible coughing and runny nose days. Bronchitis is nasty, tiring and too powerful for the antibiotics to fight it. It will linger for a while and until then I just hope everyone will stay strong and recover in no time! We had to ditch the idea of a short family vacation for it, oh well some other times perhaps.

Mama loves all of you, so pls keep on fighting! xoxo :)

CNY in advance

I had a rough morning today but hey life is perfect when its not (mel's)! Simple but true as it can be, sometimes I just thought I need to cry the whole day and laugh at the same time. Funny how love and hate come in a bundle to you. You cant separate them neither can you avoid them. All you need is adjustment in life & you are one happy bunny at work and home! * cant you see the teeth now?*

2011 and being older means being a wiser me, kinder me and most importantly being a firmer me in whatever I wanted to do. Anything and everything, but bungee jumping is still out off the list & I do not foresee that it will ever be in my list though! Perhaps another cake this weekend, choc cheese maybe? :) Or finally getting myself an LV. Teettttt wrong answer...... Okay a girl is a girl besides it doesnt hurt to daydream on blissful wed right, hmm just the thought of it makes it feels like Friday already.

Oh crap, I should get going with work, plenty of papers to read and continue writing the proposal that I am working on.

Oh ya, cant wait for the long break next wk. Happy CNY in advance! Hope dear boss in his bright-red-golden-super-happy-aura already coz I need his support to buy quartz cuvette for uv-vis using the school budget hehe.

Did u watch the news last night? Of the baby that was stabbed 5 times by her mom? Heartbreaking and scary, too many depressions and too many issues in our community now, well I leave that to the police and politicians to think abt it. Sometimes whenever I am down on the mouth or feeling lousy, making comparison with what others had to endure in their life made me a stronger person and more grateful. I couldnt ask for more, hmm or oh well maybe just this.....

delivered right thru my door, inclusive angpow that can buy me that LV (oh how can I forget? *rolls eyes*)

of birthday & cakes

just few pictures taken at her nursery, for her brief birthday bash with friends. just a small group but the girls were so excited!

sekali kan ja birthday dua dua nih..heheisnt she just cute at 2??
goodies for the kids...

cikgu cikgi were kind enough to do the backdrop. sweet! thn dpn buleh la buat lg kan...:)

Last but not least, happy birthday FIQA! You are officially 2 now! Sikit lagi and we can share lipstick and shoes ok??? :P

my fav baker was not able take my last min order well i got no one else to blame but me. hence to compensate that, i braved myself and befriended butter, eggs and flour for 2 days (yeah 2 freaking days! - 1 day to bake the cake & cool it, & 1 day to decorate, punya lamaa!!! beginners bahhh so pls excuse me) . It was based on the recipe obtained from trusty mr.google. and wallaah....proud to present to u, my first ever carrotcake with creamcheese, for fiqa's birthday at kg. ok fine i know i know i'm bragging big time here, so someone please spank me! psstttt sapa nak order, let me know...hahahaha!!!

happykids

the new peace..hv a nice weekend uols!!

missing this space

halfway marking the scripts i became dizzy. still, i really need to distinguish between taking a break with procrastination. ekks..

many good things have happened. alhamdulillah. will mentioned later, when? hopefully soon, once i have finished with my date with the exam papers. another erkks..

oh yeah, but i cannot hold this anymore. i passed my exam, woott woot!! haha, eksyen ya? ntahla, i heard that my batch is the best so far, so being me i just thought i finished at the bottom. typical, but hey. at least its worth trying, and repeating the exam. ahaks. teruk kan saya. oh well, but anyhow i guess it seems meaningless without a phd, at least thats how i understand it is when i tried asking a friend. so why bother in the in the first place.

works sucks at the moment, i am lagging way behind at one thing when i tried to be good at other things. hmm, they say that u cant be good in research , teaching and administration at the same time. true? dont know. maybe yes, maybe not.

oh i miss writing. ops hubby is here, daaa...will continue..

salam ramadhan

meet my handsome son aiman! :) he is growing up so fast. and to see those groovylicious cheeks makes me wanna bite him over and over again. salam ramadhan to dearest families and friends. moga2 amalan kita diterima dan diberkati di bulan penuh keinsafan ini..

random

all work & no play makes a dull me. yikes! i feel old & bored. new shoes, new movies plus a date will do magic. huhuu!!

learn

today i learn that once in a while it is necessary to be a good liar. weird, but so true for survival! i guess there's a blessing in disguise. the sleepless nights and hard work were meaningless thus i am sad, but i am determined to make it right this time around. :) work hard, pray and hope for the best!

in love

a friend told me that phd is a 'license' for u to have better opportunities and develop urself. true? all the best to u DrC (c stands for comel hehe).

btw, i am sooooooo in love with my new RS. (thanks to her!) This beauty rocks! :)

life & sotong

its 3 am now, just couldnt bring myself to sleep after the usual night feeding for aiman. so turn on the lappy for better luck. hoping to finish up my assignment, dang! no luck on it either. i am jumping from this sites to another when i am supposed to finish up the slides. footie on the background now, but i think since it will be kenduri sotong tonight, i do not bother to get a glimpse. cruel. maybe a little.

2 days more before the exam, i am so not prepared for it. gosh i need help. oh shoot, 1-1 now. ok back to blogging. whats up with me now? asides from work, personal life has been hectic too, but in a wonderful manner. its challenging, but funny i am so loving my chaotic life now. parenting comes in handy if u take time to watch the kids sleep. its the time they are most adorable. and the baby, i just feel like sniffing him all through his sleeps. he just smells heavenly wonderful i couldnt get enough of those milky sweet smell and his breath, my dear its intoxicating. i am in love again and again. like a loop.

research work is very minimal (yeay maybe a booooo!! for me hehe), but its getting somewhere (i hope) & positive that i learn every step of the way, maybe slower than anyone else but it is progressing (eac hates this word though, maybe my boss too haha). but i guess most of the times, it is never a fight or comparative success with others, it is always you, yourself being your major opponent.

learning things the hard way made u learn faster and wiser. true? cool anyway. in some small ways, being an opportunist is necessary. hard fact, things that i learn over the past few yrs. u think being a 'fan' is a must? haha. maybe yes maybe not. but when i heard the news that another friend is leaving, the neurons (pardon me for the spelling) in my brains lights up immediately. why? i repeatedly asked myself the same question. obviously we dont need dr house to diagnose the symptoms, do we? okay, enough said.

oops the boy is up again. another feeding session and he is a happy boy. was hoping that the other boy is up too. else, i'll bug him if i couldnt sleep. haha! almost 4 now, i better get going with work. students will be back by next wk, and my notes are nowhere to be seen. arrrrhhghh!!!.. panicking wont do me any good heh? its a seasonal thing, i'll get through this. just like i did over the last few yrs. ok children, cikgu bedah is back, watch out!

2-2 now, hang on there germany...dont be sotong kangkung tonight. please..

three days

Dah 3 hari berturut-turut syuhada ikut ke pejabat, demam. Alhamdulillah, dah makin sihat. Ramai yg komen dah makin besar dia, hmm.. ya. mungkin saya kurang perasan sbb tgk hari2 kan. Cepat sungguh masa berlalu kan. Kadang tuh ada juga berharap budak2 besar dgn cepat, but sometimes tak mau mereka membesar dgn cepat. Kids are just adorable. Syuhada pon dah byk bertanya kenapa dan apa. Berbuih mulut melayan dia.

Bila dia dah dtg ke ofis nih, alkisahnya mama dia pon bt kerja ala2 saja. Bila ada anak dkt kita, auto mode lah kita jadi ibu. X kira di mana pon. Sambil2 bt kerja sambil monitor panas dia, piece of cake! chewahhh.. mau tau berpeluh jugak saya di ofis nih, wpon sejuk beku aircond nya time2 hujan nih..Dalam demam dia tuh smpt lah ber art craft di bilik nih, bw pegi ofis pon pandai pulak dia menekan mesin photocopy. Mesti observe saya masa tgh photocopy tadi. :) She is almost 4. I like walking with her, she got too many questions and it feels as though i'm walking with my best friend as we couldnt stop gigling at everything that she said. Fun, i guess. :)

Okla, time to pick up papa dia yg berkursus di 1B. daa..

sweet tornado

almost neglecting this space...:)

life is like a controlled tornado at the moment. tiring but sweet. finding some ME time to update this place brings more guilt than pleasure hence i'm keeping my hands off this keyboard for a little while, until i can keep up with the current pace of personal things and work surrounding me.

truth is, its a little overwhelming experience for me but i feel blessed. happy thinking about the three munchkins waiting for me at home. also dreaming abt something bigger career wise. my physics teacher used to tell me this "we can never cross the same river twice". true. but we should never quit and find more options. dreams can be a reality if u work hard, pray hard and believe in urself.

for a start, i am determine to get more than 6 oz today..:)

kissing him

hello everyone, look who is here? *drumrolls* introducing my son, Syukran Aiman born on 21st of March 2010 @ 2.18 AM@ hosp likas. 3.2 kg. pic taken just 1-2 hrs after labor. guess what? he did another twist @ 4 cm. that sure keeps the doctors on alert that night. alhamdulillah despite the whole drama, its normal delivery again. kissing him good night just now. newborns smell so good dont they? :) tq for the prayers n wishes. nite nite!

oh boy!

oh boy! he's doing another flip flop again today. no wonder the back pain & extreme pelvic pressure disappear so sudddenly. i am so energetic this morning i could run a marathon. anyways, doc at the nearby clinic asked me to go the hospital again this afternoon. probably they could somehow squeeze me in for lcss tomorrow. should i? or it could be another week of bed rest? or ECV until he is finally engaged. so how?

discharge

going home today..yipppieee!!! :) baby...we'll see each other soon ok! missing the girls so much.

extended stays

ok, you can shoot me for updating frequently! but i cant help it. i am bored honestly. :) when u are put on a bedrest & feeling super healthy, it feels freaking weird.

cephalic day 1 (3/5) changed to 5/5 on day 3 (translated as partly engaged to not engaged). baby's head is down, but not engaged as in 9 AM today. if there is plenty of fluid, he might do another acrobatic flip and turn again. his ebw is slightly over 3.4 kg just 2 days ago, i dont know if he is too big that he cannot descend much further or the womb is too roomie or the extra fluid keeps him floating all this while. hmm...at the back of my mind all i can think of is this boy sure loves to play! :) bad news is, extended stays at the hospital. or worse, could be re-scheduled for lscs again. but someone has taken my slot this friday (19th). i dont know if i can wait much longer though. the edd is fast approaching.

truth is, i dont care anymore if its going to be normal or elective lscs, but i do mind if things turn to be emergency at the very last minute considering that i have reached 38 wks+. soon i'll be 39 weeks! i dont know what they are waiting for. i keep on thinking if the cord gets wrap around his neck due to the active movement. i have read so many scary stories on the net regarding unstable lie & i wish i didnt read them in the first place. :(

should i get a second opinion? any advice on which hosp or doctor should i refer too? i couldnt feel the head again down there, hence i have this strong instinct that he would want to turn again. should i go to privy and asked for elective lscs & get my worries over once & for all? or should i wait here hoping & praying that everything will be okay?

i am mentally sick from hearing the ladies screaming and crying every night. my heart shrinks thinking on the pain that they are suffering for each labor. it seems to be so painful for them. i have experienced it before & i know there is pain, but the sound of them screaming was so horrible. i am so nervous now.

alright, time to mark the paper. i am bringing some work to keep my mind off this thing for a while. hoping for the best still. Ya Allah, lindungilah kami dan permudahkanlah segala urusan kami ini. Aminnn...

cephalic day 2

as i walked along the corridor after my daughter & hubby sent me back from the canteen, i saw many empty beds. i thought series of sleepless nights listening to the baby crying and the sounds of wheelchair being pushed are the worse thing here, but when this place has become a little quiet than usual i realized i was wrong. it seemed like most of those who joined me on monday, have been sent home. with their baby of course. sigh.

when will it be my turn? a question that keeps haunting me for the past 5 days. i realized that i may have to wait a little longer. 2 days of cephalic means i still have till tomorrow for doctor to decide whether i can be discharged or need to go through another lscs.

thinking about going home w/out a baby in my arms yet, and continue the waiting game for days or maybe weeks, plus returning to work next week is somewhat unpleasant. wish i can just brush away such thought.

nevermind though, lets hope this will be over soon & i get to see my hero the soonest! :) have a nice weekend uols!

day 3

hi everyone!

currrently at the hosp waiting for almost 3 days for the most anticipated arrival of the little one. minor complication, hence i have to stay for close monitoring this week. anyways, if the baby turns head down this week, i'll probably be discharged this saturday. hmm...which means i will need to wait until real labor kicks in, maybe 2-3 weeks from now.

else, if he is still breech by end of this week, i will be scheduled for a c-sect next week. maybe i can go back to work for a couple of days next week huh. hmm...why not do the elective surgery this week..

just a little tired, anxious and nervous too.. hope things will turn out alright..:)

they will do another scan today, and make a decision on the next plan. will update soon! taa..

nervous

doc advised me to go the hosp 3 days ago to see whether i need to go thru c-sect. but i didnt, secretly hoping and praying that the baby will turn by himself to the correct position over the weekend. but i think he didnt, as i can feel him sitting exactly at the same spot. hmm..trying very hard to finish up some of the urgent work today. boy, i am nervous thinking that i still have tonnes of things to do at the office. and i am freaking out thinking if its gonna be another c-sect.

my final will be this friday and i havent asked the academic to make a copy of the questions. oh dear. maybe i am thinking too much of work at the moment. should really sit back and relax.

till then, wish me luck! :)

Alhamdulillah

What a great start for today! Almost everyone in the program got it. Alhamdulillah :)