Random thoughts

So it is confirmed. I am off to JB by middle of next month. :)

Alhamdulillah. After the long wait, now the time has come for real. Excited. Nervous too. And a little sad. I still dont know whom to bring to UTM. Certainly it is not easy to make my preferences. Of course it is difficult when the option is againsts the mommyhood nature. Mellow me thinks I will certainly miss watching them grow up. I can always go home once a mth or maybe twice (uhuks!), but I can never make up the time I lost with them even for a sec. It counts, for me it does. I miss some part of the growing up process. Hopefully not on important dates, like birthdays, etc. So I have to make it clear to myself whatever I chose to do now must have greater values than the sacrifices the kids have to make. I guess even 10 phd degrees, will not be able to compensate everything, but at least, its worth it.

I dont know if its a good sign to have dreams about registering to hostels, going to labs, and having discussions with supervisor. Every night. Oh dear, cold sweats and I was shaking. I just hope that its normal to hv those endless dreams. And praying that it would not be that bad lah when it is happening for real. :)

And workwise, okay I must admit that somedays I do things like a machine, non-stop and so efficient. *perasan, pls excuse me*. But there were also days, when I dont feel like doing any work at all. My heart and my mind are already in UTM. Hehe... Should be a good sign right? As of now, with the help of dear hubby, we are doing some preparation over there, nasib baik lah not in london, otherwise kelam kabut juga la saya kan. :) And hoping that the settling down process will be easier too. OK, need to pass some files on FYP to a colleague. Weeeee..glad I dont have to do it anymore. Hehehe...Guilty but pleased...:) CR6 done, 2 reports on advance done, FYP prep done, docs to KPT done, now I am left with FRGS report and I have to close the account, also need to finish up on detergent book. Applying for 25 days annual leave too :).

Deep down, I do hope I made the right choice at the right time. And praying for everything to be alright. I dont know if success will be on my sides, but I guess I will never find out if I dont try. Oprah said the biggest adventure a person can ever take is to live the life of their dreams. So I will do just that. :) and YOU should too.